Ab kya karein?? Gaana gaate hain!
Main tenu samjhawan ki...
Tu KEYGEN pyaar mera !!
:D
You are here. You are queer. Shed no tears. Face your fears.
Budhe logon ki aadatein :D
Kuch cheezein hai jo budhe hone pe main NAHIN karunga:
1. Saturday ko Sachurday bolna
2. Kaan saaf karte hue awaaz nikalni
3. Haan or na mein thook wali awaaz nikalni
4. Adult diapers
5. Gyaan bantna
6. Denture lagaana
7. Hai main mar gayi! bolna
8. Dakaar ko 'om' ya 'hari om' mein morph karna
9. Bachon ko shararat karne se rokna
10. Kitty party
11. Taash khelna
Padh marna aur act karna jaise yeh normal hai
1. Saturday ko Sachurday bolna
2. Kaan saaf karte hue awaaz nikalni
3. Haan or na mein thook wali awaaz nikalni
4. Adult diapers
5. Gyaan bantna
6. Denture lagaana
7. Hai main mar gayi! bolna
8. Dakaar ko 'om' ya 'hari om' mein morph karna
9. Bachon ko shararat karne se rokna
10. Kitty party
11. Taash khelna
Padh marna aur act karna jaise yeh normal hai
इक महल हो सपने को
Hasste hasste kat jaye raste,
Toh taxi lene ka kya fayda?
Mere favourite snack toh rahegi maggi,
Even if its only water and maida!
Wah wah waaaaaaaow !
Duniya hai pyaari, ek abla naari,
Jo dhund rahi hai ek pen,
English aur hindi toh moh maya hai,
Murgi is murgi, hen is hen!
Wah wah waaaaaaaow !
Chamach se khana ya kaante se,
Khaana toh eating hi hota hai,
Sunlo balak, sab hain selfish,
Main apni dhota, tu apni dhota hai!
Wah wah waaaaaaaow !
Computer pe baithe, kaam karne
Kahaan bijli waste hoti hai,
Farts ko bhi use karna seekho balak,
Kyonki hawa toh bekaar, par smell toh moti hai!
Wah wah waaaaaaaow !
Dhaniya powder aur ice cream soup,
Yehi toh cheezein mahaan hai,
Jaise Himesh Reshammiya ki surili awaaz,
Mere liye haraam, tere liye bhagwan hai !
Wah wah waaaaaaaow !
Toh taxi lene ka kya fayda?
Mere favourite snack toh rahegi maggi,
Even if its only water and maida!
Wah wah waaaaaaaow !
Duniya hai pyaari, ek abla naari,
Jo dhund rahi hai ek pen,
English aur hindi toh moh maya hai,
Murgi is murgi, hen is hen!
Wah wah waaaaaaaow !
Chamach se khana ya kaante se,
Khaana toh eating hi hota hai,
Sunlo balak, sab hain selfish,
Main apni dhota, tu apni dhota hai!
Wah wah waaaaaaaow !
Computer pe baithe, kaam karne
Kahaan bijli waste hoti hai,
Farts ko bhi use karna seekho balak,
Kyonki hawa toh bekaar, par smell toh moti hai!
Wah wah waaaaaaaow !
Dhaniya powder aur ice cream soup,
Yehi toh cheezein mahaan hai,
Jaise Himesh Reshammiya ki surili awaaz,
Mere liye haraam, tere liye bhagwan hai !
Wah wah waaaaaaaow !
Heels
Hum sabko Heels ki secondary uses pata hain
1. Lambe dikhne ke liye
2. Dance ke liye
3. Formal wear
PARR, kya aap jante hain heels invent kisne ki?
Kahani suno!
Ek mali tha, aur woh ek public garden ka dhyaan rakhta tha. Wahaan ki mitti ko usse baar baar khurpi se theek karna padhta tha. Usne soch, " Itna bada Garden, Itni choti khurpi.. kuch toh karna padega! "
Usne socha, kyon na ladkiyon ke pairon mein khurpi baand di jaye? Aur ek gol gappa party rakh di jaye garden mein? Bas, phir kya tha.. usne normal jooton ke neeche khurpiyan chipkayi aur ladkiyon ko bola, " Aao gol gappe khao! Free mein!"
Saari ladkiyan apne khurpi wale jooton ke saath bhaagi uss garden mein. Gol gappe wale ko instructions thi ki woh apni redhi idhar udhar bhagata rahe. Phir kya tha? Gol gappe wala aage aage, ladkiyan peeche peeche.. Dekhte hi dekhte, pure garden mein khurpiyan baj gayi! Isse Mali ne dekha ki uske haath pe lagi chot ko bhi heal hone ka mauka mila.. uska naam padha "HEEL".. kyonki usse 'heal' ke spelling ni aate the.
Wikipedia pe aisa gyaan ni milega apko.
Uses:
1. Akhrot todhne ke liye
2. Chintiyon ki shaadi hoti hain heels ke neeche. Woh unke liye tent hota hai (contributed)
3. Chot "heel" karne ke liye
4. Deewar mein keel thokne ke liye
5. Zameen pe awaaz nikal ke logon ko tang karne ke liye
6. Heel the world, make it a better place! - Micheal Jackson
7. Apni pyaas bujhane ke liye.. nahin samjhe?
ABCD bolo.. J ke baad heel use karo.. Jheel ? Jheel = Pani. Har baat samjhani padegi kya?
8. Kisi stationary cheez ko heelane ke liye
9. Masale peesne ke liye.
10. Wine bottle ko band karne ke liye
11. Scale wali heel use ki ja sakti hai sadak pe paani ka level naapne ke liye
12. Agar samundar mein ghum ho, toh land dhundne ke liye. Kaise?
Yaar.. Sa re ga ma gao.. Sa gaane ke baad heel use karo.. Saheel = Sahil = Coast. Tum bahut hi duffer ho, homework dun kya ab?
13. Kahin log heels haath mein pehen kar keyboard pe type karte hain
14. Kaan saaf karne ke liye
15. Naak mein ungli ki jagah heel ghusayo!
Aur kuch ?
1. Lambe dikhne ke liye
2. Dance ke liye
3. Formal wear
PARR, kya aap jante hain heels invent kisne ki?
Kahani suno!
Ek mali tha, aur woh ek public garden ka dhyaan rakhta tha. Wahaan ki mitti ko usse baar baar khurpi se theek karna padhta tha. Usne soch, " Itna bada Garden, Itni choti khurpi.. kuch toh karna padega! "
Usne socha, kyon na ladkiyon ke pairon mein khurpi baand di jaye? Aur ek gol gappa party rakh di jaye garden mein? Bas, phir kya tha.. usne normal jooton ke neeche khurpiyan chipkayi aur ladkiyon ko bola, " Aao gol gappe khao! Free mein!"
Saari ladkiyan apne khurpi wale jooton ke saath bhaagi uss garden mein. Gol gappe wale ko instructions thi ki woh apni redhi idhar udhar bhagata rahe. Phir kya tha? Gol gappe wala aage aage, ladkiyan peeche peeche.. Dekhte hi dekhte, pure garden mein khurpiyan baj gayi! Isse Mali ne dekha ki uske haath pe lagi chot ko bhi heal hone ka mauka mila.. uska naam padha "HEEL".. kyonki usse 'heal' ke spelling ni aate the.
Wikipedia pe aisa gyaan ni milega apko.
Uses:
1. Akhrot todhne ke liye
2. Chintiyon ki shaadi hoti hain heels ke neeche. Woh unke liye tent hota hai (contributed)
3. Chot "heel" karne ke liye
4. Deewar mein keel thokne ke liye
5. Zameen pe awaaz nikal ke logon ko tang karne ke liye
6. Heel the world, make it a better place! - Micheal Jackson
7. Apni pyaas bujhane ke liye.. nahin samjhe?
ABCD bolo.. J ke baad heel use karo.. Jheel ? Jheel = Pani. Har baat samjhani padegi kya?
8. Kisi stationary cheez ko heelane ke liye
9. Masale peesne ke liye.
10. Wine bottle ko band karne ke liye
11. Scale wali heel use ki ja sakti hai sadak pe paani ka level naapne ke liye
12. Agar samundar mein ghum ho, toh land dhundne ke liye. Kaise?
Yaar.. Sa re ga ma gao.. Sa gaane ke baad heel use karo.. Saheel = Sahil = Coast. Tum bahut hi duffer ho, homework dun kya ab?
13. Kahin log heels haath mein pehen kar keyboard pe type karte hain
14. Kaan saaf karne ke liye
15. Naak mein ungli ki jagah heel ghusayo!
Aur kuch ?
उलटी मारने के बहाने !
1. Giant Wheel
2. Beer
3. Ladkiyan ka 'lol' bolna
4. Brush karte huye, zyada hi senti ho jana
5. Khaane mein namak zyada
6. Chewing gum khate huye koi fart mar de toh
7. Beer
8. Dabba kholte hi gandi smell
9. Kisi ke potty karne ke baad uss bathroom mein chale jana
10. Jab koi manly banda, lolzzz bAbEzZ type kare.
11. Celebrity display pictures
12. Topless with raybans and yo sign pictures
13. Girls kissing each other pictures
14. Photoshopped background pictures
15. Beer
16. Toilet paper beech use mein fatt jaye
17. Bus ka safar
18. Saste milkshake
19. Yeh blog padhna
20. Naak mein ungli dalkar galti se chaat lena
21. Badbudar logon ko jhappi pani ( V***S)
22. Apni armpits sungna
23. Kisi aur ki armpits sungna
24. Agar aapka dentist aapke khule muh mein apni juraab daal de
25. Agar aapka dost aapke takiye pe padh mar ke na bataye
26. Agar koi apni naak nikal ke aap pe ponch de
27. Beer
28. Keede wali litchi kha lena
29. Apne upar galti se susu kar dena ( ladkiyan ki exception)
30. Jungle mein potty karne ke baad slip hoke ussi mein gir jaana
31. 10 din se brush na kare bande ko kiss karna
32. Pastry khana
33. Agar koi thook ka packet aapko pila de
34. Agar koi aapke samne apni ankhon mein potty chipka le
35. Agar koi apne pimple phod ke uska juice chaat le
36. Agar aapki tikki mein bahut lamba baal nikle
37. Koi apna paseena collect karke aapko pila de ( Jackass)
38. Koi apne nakhune se saaf ki hui mael ka churan bana ke khila de aapko
39. Apni aankhon ki gidd kha lena
40. Agar swimming pool mein underwater jake aapko susu ka taste aaye
41. Mere baare mein sochte hi
42. Apni ulti karne ke baad phirse usse peene se
comments mein baaki likh dena.. main woh delete karke is list mein add kar duna.. mera blog hai, meri marzi
2. Beer
3. Ladkiyan ka 'lol' bolna
4. Brush karte huye, zyada hi senti ho jana
5. Khaane mein namak zyada
6. Chewing gum khate huye koi fart mar de toh
7. Beer
8. Dabba kholte hi gandi smell
9. Kisi ke potty karne ke baad uss bathroom mein chale jana
10. Jab koi manly banda, lolzzz bAbEzZ type kare.
11. Celebrity display pictures
12. Topless with raybans and yo sign pictures
13. Girls kissing each other pictures
14. Photoshopped background pictures
15. Beer
16. Toilet paper beech use mein fatt jaye
17. Bus ka safar
18. Saste milkshake
19. Yeh blog padhna
20. Naak mein ungli dalkar galti se chaat lena
21. Badbudar logon ko jhappi pani ( V***S)
22. Apni armpits sungna
23. Kisi aur ki armpits sungna
24. Agar aapka dentist aapke khule muh mein apni juraab daal de
25. Agar aapka dost aapke takiye pe padh mar ke na bataye
26. Agar koi apni naak nikal ke aap pe ponch de
27. Beer
28. Keede wali litchi kha lena
29. Apne upar galti se susu kar dena ( ladkiyan ki exception)
30. Jungle mein potty karne ke baad slip hoke ussi mein gir jaana
31. 10 din se brush na kare bande ko kiss karna
32. Pastry khana
33. Agar koi thook ka packet aapko pila de
34. Agar koi aapke samne apni ankhon mein potty chipka le
35. Agar koi apne pimple phod ke uska juice chaat le
36. Agar aapki tikki mein bahut lamba baal nikle
37. Koi apna paseena collect karke aapko pila de ( Jackass)
38. Koi apne nakhune se saaf ki hui mael ka churan bana ke khila de aapko
39. Apni aankhon ki gidd kha lena
40. Agar swimming pool mein underwater jake aapko susu ka taste aaye
41. Mere baare mein sochte hi
42. Apni ulti karne ke baad phirse usse peene se
comments mein baaki likh dena.. main woh delete karke is list mein add kar duna.. mera blog hai, meri marzi
Muli ka hatoda
Yo... This is MC Phusee.. Check this out
Yo.. Yo..
Bahut sochne ke baad maine khaya paranthaa,
Par mujhe kya pata tha woh atta bewafa tha?
Woh dhaba naya, main pehli baar gaya tha..
Ghar jaake main toh aaram se soya tha..
Par kya batayun yaar kitna roya tha...
College mein baitha, main padh raha tha..
Andar hi andar pressure badh raha tha..
Pankhe the band, kamra sadh raha tha..
Apni hi awaaz se main darr raha tha..
Kisko batayun, kaise chupayun..
Apna yeh dard main kise sunayun..
Pet sambhalun ya sir hilayun..
Phir socha maine zara toilet ho ayun...
Main utha aur bola, 'Excuse me sir'
Sir bola, ' Chup kar ke baith aur padh!'
Bas itna hi tha, meri himmat gayi marr..
Ab suno uss pal ka bhayanak asar..
Sooooon kar ke maine woh padh choda...
Tham gayi duniya, mera bhaag gaya ghoda..
Ek dum se sabne apni naak pakdi,
Jaise baja ho kisi ko muli ka hathoda..
Bache chillaye,
Teacher ghabraye,
Padosi bhi bole,'mar jayun aaye haaye'
Ek hi vaar se maine 10 pedh hilaye,
Suar bhi soch rahe, kahaan muh chupaye..
Peth ko toh mere mil gaya tha chain,
Singh bola mujhe, ' Teri karun maa paen!'
Tubelight gayi fatt, ghum gaye the fan..
Awaaz thi zero, effect ten out of ten!
Dur baitha mali, ho gaya behosh,
Peeche baithe bacho ki aankhon mein aakrosh,
Maar padi mujhe, tha dhabe wale ka dosh
Haan ek hi pad ne, meri badal di soch..
Socho main chalun khaa ke kahin tinde ka achaar,
Teri hazaar bandook, mera ek hi hathyaar,
Tu phaenk barood, main bhi maru dahaad,
Mere jaisa koi nahi, baby Anna Hazaar!
Hafte ki chutti, phir college khula,
Humara studio, tezaab se dhula,
Haan main hun Arjun, maine choda tha woh teer
Canteen mein tha dudh, ab woh ban gaya paneer
Kuch hi pal mein meri badal gayi taqdeer..
Bol! Chilla!
Kuch bhi khila,
Tune maare dhakke,
Par mera tua na hila !
Panga na lena, teri naak se niklega khoon...
Ruk zara! Ruk ruk zara !! Pooooooon !!
Yeah.
Yo.. Yo..
Bahut sochne ke baad maine khaya paranthaa,
Par mujhe kya pata tha woh atta bewafa tha?
Woh dhaba naya, main pehli baar gaya tha..
Ghar jaake main toh aaram se soya tha..
Par kya batayun yaar kitna roya tha...
College mein baitha, main padh raha tha..
Andar hi andar pressure badh raha tha..
Pankhe the band, kamra sadh raha tha..
Apni hi awaaz se main darr raha tha..
Kisko batayun, kaise chupayun..
Apna yeh dard main kise sunayun..
Pet sambhalun ya sir hilayun..
Phir socha maine zara toilet ho ayun...
Main utha aur bola, 'Excuse me sir'
Sir bola, ' Chup kar ke baith aur padh!'
Bas itna hi tha, meri himmat gayi marr..
Ab suno uss pal ka bhayanak asar..
Sooooon kar ke maine woh padh choda...
Tham gayi duniya, mera bhaag gaya ghoda..
Ek dum se sabne apni naak pakdi,
Jaise baja ho kisi ko muli ka hathoda..
Bache chillaye,
Teacher ghabraye,
Padosi bhi bole,'mar jayun aaye haaye'
Ek hi vaar se maine 10 pedh hilaye,
Suar bhi soch rahe, kahaan muh chupaye..
Peth ko toh mere mil gaya tha chain,
Singh bola mujhe, ' Teri karun maa paen!'
Tubelight gayi fatt, ghum gaye the fan..
Awaaz thi zero, effect ten out of ten!
Dur baitha mali, ho gaya behosh,
Peeche baithe bacho ki aankhon mein aakrosh,
Maar padi mujhe, tha dhabe wale ka dosh
Haan ek hi pad ne, meri badal di soch..
Socho main chalun khaa ke kahin tinde ka achaar,
Teri hazaar bandook, mera ek hi hathyaar,
Tu phaenk barood, main bhi maru dahaad,
Mere jaisa koi nahi, baby Anna Hazaar!
Hafte ki chutti, phir college khula,
Humara studio, tezaab se dhula,
Haan main hun Arjun, maine choda tha woh teer
Canteen mein tha dudh, ab woh ban gaya paneer
Kuch hi pal mein meri badal gayi taqdeer..
Bol! Chilla!
Kuch bhi khila,
Tune maare dhakke,
Par mera tua na hila !
Panga na lena, teri naak se niklega khoon...
Ruk zara! Ruk ruk zara !! Pooooooon !!
Yeah.
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